Marriage was one of the most important changes in a person's life. It joined a man and woman, but it also created new relationships between their families.
Marriage affected where people lived and how property was handled. It also shaped the future of the household through the birth and raising of children.
Overview
Marriage in first-century Jewish life was both a personal and a family matter. Parents and relatives could play an important role in arranging a marriage. Economic circumstances also mattered.
Marriage normally involved more than a single wedding day. A couple could first enter a binding agreement or betrothal. The bride would later join her husband and the marriage would be celebrated.
Weddings were joyful community events. Food and celebration could continue for more than a brief ceremony.
Marriage also brought responsibilities. Husbands were expected to provide for their households. Wives played a central role in managing daily family life.
Children were highly valued. They continued the family and could provide support as parents grew older.
Marriage could also end. Jewish law allowed divorce under certain circumstances. Death could leave a husband or wife widowed and facing a very different future.
What We Know
Our evidence for Jewish marriage comes from several sources. Biblical law provides an important foundation. Marriage documents and other ancient writings give us additional information about agreements and property.
Later Jewish writings preserve many discussions about marriage and divorce. They are valuable, but they must be used carefully when describing the first century.
Practices also differed according to wealth and circumstance. We should not imagine that every Jewish wedding or marriage followed exactly the same pattern.
Biblical Context
Marriage begins early in the biblical story. Genesis describes a man and woman becoming “one flesh,” establishing marriage as a basic part of family life.
The Law of Moses addresses marriage, divorce, inheritance, and the responsibilities created by family relationships.
Marriage also appears throughout the Gospels. Mary was betrothed to Joseph when she learned that she would give birth to Jesus. Their situation shows that betrothal was much more serious than a modern engagement.
Jesus attended a wedding at Cana. He also taught about marriage and divorce, pointing His listeners back to God's purpose for marriage in creation.
Why It Matters
Modern readers can easily picture a biblical wedding through the customs of their own time. That can hide important parts of the Gospel world.
Betrothal carried real obligations. Marriage joined families as well as individuals. Property and children were practical concerns that affected a household's future.
This background helps us better understand Joseph's situation when Mary became pregnant. It also gives greater meaning to Jesus' teaching about marriage and divorce.
Learning how marriage worked helps us see these Gospel accounts within the family world in which they actually took place.
Entering Marriage
Marriage in Jewish Family Life
Marriage was an important part of Jewish family life. It joined a man and woman, but it also created new relationships between their families. Marriage brought practical responsibilities and usually carried the expectation of children and a continuing household.
Choosing a Marriage Partner
Choosing a husband or wife was often a family matter. Parents and relatives could help arrange a match. Family background and economic circumstances mattered. Personal wishes could matter too, so we should not imagine every marriage as a transaction decided entirely by parents.
Betrothal
Betrothal was much more serious than a modern engagement. A betrothed couple had entered a binding stage of marriage, even though they might not yet be living together as husband and wife. Ending that relationship required more than simply calling off a wedding.
Marriage Agreements and Obligations
Marriage created practical obligations as well as a family relationship. Property and financial arrangements could be part of the agreement. These arrangements helped define responsibilities between the couple and their families. They could also provide some economic protection if the marriage ended.
Preparing and Celebrating
The Bride and Groom
A wedding marked a major change for both bride and groom. They were becoming husband and wife and beginning a new stage of family life. Their marriage also joined two families and brought new responsibilities.
Preparing for Marriage
A marriage required preparation by more than the bride and groom. Families had practical arrangements to make before married life began. A wedding celebration also required food and other provisions for the guests.
The Wedding Celebration
A wedding was a joyful family and community celebration. Guests gathered to share food and drink and to honor the bride and groom. Some weddings included a procession. The celebration could continue beyond a single meal.
Married Life
Beginning a New Household
After the wedding, the couple began married life together. This did not always mean moving into a completely separate house. They might live near relatives or within a larger family household. What mattered was that they were now building a life together as husband and wife.
Marriage, Property and Economic Security
Marriage had an important economic side. A household needed resources to survive, and property could be part of the marriage arrangements. These arrangements also affected a wife's security if her husband died or the marriage ended.
Expectations of Husbands and Wives
Husbands and wives had different responsibilities within the household. A husband was expected to help provide for his family. A wife played a central role in managing the home. Their work together helped keep the household functioning.
Marriage and Children
Children were normally hoped for within marriage. They brought joy to a family and continued its future. They also became part of the working household as they grew older. For couples who could not have children, the experience could be deeply painful.
Divorce, Widowhood and Remarriage
Divorce and the End of Marriage
Divorce was permitted within Jewish law, but it was a serious end to a marriage. It could affect property and financial support. It also changed relationships between two families. Questions about when divorce was justified were debated in the time of Jesus.
Widowhood and Remarriage
Death could bring a marriage to an early end. A widow or widower might still be relatively young and could marry again. For a widow, the loss of a husband could also mean the loss of an important source of economic support.